I was on break from a clinical rotation in the psych ward at Bridgeport Hospital and found myself standing in line at Chipotle behind a group of large bearded male construction workers. Feeling myself internalize the body’s natural fear response via amygdaloid activation when we see a person who is larger than us, I quickly rewired my thoughts to my frontal lobe which deals with reasoning and planning for the future. Recognizing that fear is a normal and anticipated response of the brain, you too can train yourself to walk away from allowing that mechanism to consume you.
As I read the room, I noted these men likely have low blood sugar levels from hard labor and are potentially agitated from being hungry. 8 men. Option A is to always retreat given the clear exit through the way I came. Avoidance is self defense. IF I got into an engagement with them, what are my options? I quickly identified the need for a force multiplier. Recognizing I left my gun and winkler knife in my backed-in vehicle parked out front, I needed a tool or weapon of opportunity in my environment that I may use to even the playing field when outnumbered. I have trained myself in peacetime through Pavlovian classical conditioning to seek such items when I am met with a substantial force. Identifying the chairs to my immediate right can move by slightly tapping one, I selected that tool as an option to be used as a barrier and blunt force weapon. The stools I noted were fixed to the ground via bolts. Seeing no hazards beneath my feet such as spills or uneven terrain, I kept the option to use my legs as distance weapons at play. Exits. Always have two ways out. If overrun during the engagement, I have the exit a few paces behind me (noting there are a few unlucky customers behind me… barriers), and another exit along the far right wall. In identifying an alternative method of egress, I saw three large pink, iced drinks sitting on a table hardly sweating. If I throw one in their face (OODA), they may wipe it away and now have wet palms which are more likely to slide off me if I was grabbed. That play doubles as compromising their footing as well. Know your enemy. They may have knives or multitools as weapons due to their professions. Legs, chairs, distance weapons. Big bellies noted, lack in stamina… big trees fall hard. Attack the knees.
I then observed those with wristwatches to identify handedness, knowing there is a high probability if his watch is on his left wrist he is right handed. Like with gathering HUMINT, human intelligence overseas, always have at least 2 methods of verification before conducting an operation. I then observed which pockets they stored their phones in to ID and or confirm who is right or left handed. Back knee soft, rear heel of foot ever so slightly disconnected from the ground I made a conscious decision to physically prepare for a burst 360 in any direction. Arms in interview stance. Situational awareness: Who’s in the room? What’s in the room? People, hasty weapons of opportunity, exits? Check. Where am I in relation to those identified variables? Check. What condition am I in? No deliberate weapons on hand, non-violent posture staged, no injuries, keys in left pocket. Check. The two ribbed surfaces on my car keys by feel tell me that’s the lock button. If a rapid movement to the vehicle was made, I’d click the non-ribbed button. This motor action has also been classically conditioned. When I get to my vehicle, two options. If I had to go, the driver’s seat is the best option. If I had to stay and fight, the passenger seat is more efficiently located to reach the gun and fixed blade in my glove box. Driver’s seat gives me access to both. Always have a way (or two) out. I stepped forward in line and purchased my burrito bowl with no altercation.
Understanding that no plan ever survives first contact, I would never view that chain of thoughts in my head as paranoia, a waste of time, or overreacting. It is simply vigilance. What’s the alternative? Stand there clueless on my phone and potentially be a victim? We are creatures of habit. How I behave for my own safety is likely how I will behave when I am protecting my family. They will never be the victim when I am in the room. I choose to be one step ahead of the people around me as I navigate the animal kingdom. It will always be worth the repetition.
